Love in the Time of Emphysema

We're all addicted to something
that either helps us feel a little 
or stops us feeling quite so much. 
But we're all addicted to something,
because no matter what you or I do
what we feel is never quite enough.

I'm not addicted to you. Or at least, that's what I tell my friends. 


I don't need you. But I do really like you. You have some sort of spell over me - I think about you all the time, even when I don't have you; I miss you; I dream about you; I cry about you. 


And then, when I'm tired or stressed or lonely and I feel your arms wrap slowly around me, I smile because I know you're there for me. And then, when I haven't seen you for a week or so, and you pull me close and hold me, I feel out of the world. I couldn't walk if you asked me to. My head spins but in such a good way that I never want to let you go. 


So many of my friends hate you. It's so very high school, so very dramatic. They say you're cheap, you're bad for me, I could do better. But no one makes me feel like you do.


No one makes me forget the rest of the world like you do.
No one makes me just let go, and stop caring like you do.
No one makes me see things as clearly as you do. 


And sure, no one else probably fucks up my lungs as bad as you do, or make me cough all the time, or puts me at a risk for cancer, but god damn it, I love you and I don't care.