Love In The Time Of Adolescence*

My life is not perfect.
I went through terrible child abuse right up to the age of fourteen.
I have bipolar disorder, psychotic episodes, an anxiety disorder and some sort of borderline personality.
I have no real friends.
I have brains but no will to use them.
I could be pretty, but I stress eat.
I cry myself to sleep, most nights.

But every once in a while, I look into my boyfriend's eyes, and all the pain vanishes. I look back and wonder how I ever survived without him. It's hard, now, to remember a time when he wasn't the only face I saw in a crowd. I know it was less than two years ago, but I can hardly imagine not being in love with him.

He makes me smile, and laugh and feel beautiful even when I'm feeling ugly. When he laughs, is whole face lifts up, and he looks like the happiest man in the world. His hands are never a normal temperature - they're always either freezing, or burning up. He's one of the most intelligent people I have ever met, and I admire his mind so much more than anyone else's.

He almost makes me wish I was religious, so I could thank God for him.

*Because yes, adolescence is a disease comparable to cholera.